a desperate cry for help

I don't know what to do with my life .
Am I suppost to be a good person? If yes then how, when ? 
If I'm not suppost to care about that, then what am I suppost to care about? What is the real meaning of life? Y can't I get absolutetly any ansers?
What's going on inside of me, that I dispise my own behavior, but dont know what to do to make it beter, if that's even important.

WHO AM I ????  WHY?????  WHAT FOR ??????AND HOW TO DO WHAT I WAS BORN TO ????????? ??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????


I'M KILLING MYSELF WITH THESE QUESTIONS,   BUT I CAN'T STOP, CAUSE I DON'T KNOW THE ANSERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  

And there are so many more.....
Please ask God to help me, cause I've been asking that for a few years, but it looks like he can't hear me, and if he can, looks like he doesn't care, or doesn't wanna answer.
I need help, and I need it fast!!!!