Quos Amor Verus Tenuit, Tenebit.

Then,

Not so suddenly, but not expected

A couple months later, while recovering from the wounds of throwing yourself out of a moving car and into a highway, you see someone riding a bike. And you realize you have a bike.


You've had a bike for a while now.


They call out your name, invite you to ride alongside them and you go. Then you realize your life is moving. You can still speed on a bike and you can stop to enjoy nature on a bike. You know that this bike is never going to become a car, bounding you eternal to this person or this ride, but these two people are always going to be very good bike mates. And though you long for a car someday, when you can trust being in a car again, for now you're happy riding your bike.

She speeds when you speed. She slows down when you slow down. She warns you that there's a car coming and listens when you warm her. She turns when you want to turn so you trust to turn when she turns too.

She enjoys the ride with you. She doesn't criticize the other passengers nor the other drivers. She knows everybody is fighting a battle she will never know about and she respects that. God, if feels so good to be respected.

She's just enjoying her bike ride. Suddenly, as you watch her turn, slow down and speed up, admire nature with you and be just as free as are, you realize you feel safe again. I'm glad to have you as company, she says with words and without. She is genuinely sweet, no weight behind that word. You can tell her that you need her and she knows what you mean. You can tell her that she's yours for the time being and she'll take it, no backlash, no wise retort to teach you about the world and its dangers. Just enjoyment, appreciation for your experience, your life, your words. She tells you she's enjoying this ride with you every chance she gets, to the point where, because you're not used to it, you find it suspicious. Then you remember who she is and realize she just really enjoys your company. Always has and always will.


She has forgiven you for abandoning her at a stop without ever saying goodbye. She understands the choices you made and doesn't blame you for them, even before you've been able to do the same for yourself. You can trust this one. Your heart will not skip a beat for her, but you can trust to ride alongside her and you can love her completely, for the time being.



Quos Amor Verus Tenuit, Tenebit. - True Love Will Hold On to Those Whom It Has Held.