When she asks about my first kiss

Once upon a time there was a boy, and I liked him
a little...

Then we kissed the first time,
then the second,
the third,
fourth,

Then God told me to break it off.
Not like that, no.
He just showed me that something was wrong there.
I disobeyed.

My love for him grew for a month
...
Then the boy decided to break it off himself,
over reasons I struggle with forgiving to this day.

I cried for a couple days, maybe a week,
And tried to find out what I had done wrong.

The real pain came when I asked him,
and he told me I had part off the blame
however lightly he put it.
I asked to make it up to him,
then he angrily pushed me away.

I still remember that face.

                                                   ***

Years passed and we became great friends, even with little contact.
He trusts me, and I trust him.
We're good friends.

He was the bravest, most courteous and gentle man I ever had that close.
Even though I wouldn't date him today, I never forgot him.
I never forgot my first kiss.

It was sweet and beautiful,
but the never forgetting part is one I definitely do regret.