To remember...forever.

• Yes, I promise;
• I'll go with you.

     If you read these alone, without knowing the story behind each frase, you may not feel the weight and the strength they carry, but be it known, it's there.

     Each of these frases marked my life in a different way. There are many other frases, but I only put these 2, cause the're the smallest, and are among the most important of them all.

     The first came from a conversation I had with a good friend of mine, after a terrible day. Long story short, that day I needed to decide if I would leave my home, and everything the future in that house had for me, and be free, and go live with my mother, or if I would stay and have to suffer a problem I had nothing to do with and would never get better. Plus, the day before, I heard so many bad things about myself and about my way of thinking, and how I was and have been wasting all my time with nothing important. But to me, this year has been the best year of my life, with ups and downs, yes, but it's been great. But the things I heard, were not wrong in they're totality, so I needed to know, with someone I trust and had spent the year with, if that was true or not. So I sent a message to my dearest Maby saying: "Can you promise me, our friendship, is worth the time, and will be kept though time passes?". At that moment I was crying a river, and desperately needed help. I needed anything just to know I wasn't alone. And her marking answer, was a super small frase, with great power and impact... "Yes, I promise."  ->October 3rd 2011, 6:14 pm.

                    -> I'll go with you.<-

     This one was said  far before the first one I spoke of, but this one changed me very seriously, so I left it last. I'm alive today because of this frase.
     I had also had a terrible day, but that day, I was going through a crises. Everything and everyone was against me, even at school I had had a bad day...that's very rare. It came together with one of those weeks that bring the worst of life all at the same time, you know? I was going through a lot - alone.

     And in the middle of all that, I had the thought of killing myself. Yes, for real. I cried like never before, when I thought that was the only way to make it all stop. There was no hope. So I began my farewells. I said bye to my Keepers, to a few other friends, to my family (brothers, sisters, and my mom), and said I was leaving.
     People started to ask where was I going, but all I answered was that I couldn't stand this life anymore and I didn't want to cause anymore pain to anyone so I was leaving. Some of my keepers understood and told me not to do it, but I had made my decision, in great pain, but I couldn't stand the idea of one more day of this life. Then, one of my keepers said the frase that changed everything:
  "I'll go with you."
     Just the idea of a friend of mine dieing because of me, was already torture, and this friend had the same problem I had, and to think that I was provoking that, made me change my mind. I struggled cause I didn't want to wake up ever again, but I didn't want both my friends and her friends suffering and hurting all because of something I decided to do, but suddenly affected someone else. Then I started to realize what I was doing was stupid, and causeless. Now I was worried about her. I didn't sleep that night, but I never had the thought again. All because of who she was, and what she said. I thank God every time I can, for giving me her as a friend.

               Thank you Maby for letting God use you to save my life that night.     ->April 27th 2011

Me ajuda?

          To afim de matar alguém hoje! Ela vem me machucando a já algum tempo. Mas não é sempre um machucado normal....
          Paredes toráxicas encolhem, sombras de sonhos despencam, ossos esfarelam, animo se dilúi. Felicidade anda de mãos dadas com ela. As vezes vejo a felicidade acenando, ou gritando meu nome. A vilã me permite um maravilhoso segundo para apreciar a felicidade, apenas para me torturar ainda mais quando a encobre, esconde, afasta de mim. Um saquinho de fragmentos de água ardente, presentes para os meus olhos, é a única coisa que me deixa quase todas as vezes que me vê.

          Hoje quero vingança!
          Cada gota que escorreu tem que ser paga com um "risco de sufocamento"!
Suspeito, que como o gato, ela tenha 7 vidas - só assim pra explicar como ela sempre aparece depois de um tempo, mas de hoje ela não me escapa!
Mas ela é forte, e bem maior que eu. Só pode ser vencida por 2 pessoas, então...Topa me ajudar?
Não se preocupe com armas, só preciso dos seus braços pra vencer.
Ah, o nome dela é saudade...

Small, but good for now.

People who never made me ask what I was doing wen I was with them.
People who made feel good in terrible moments.
People who never gave up on me.
My BEST FRIENDS
My LIFE FRIENDS
My KEEPERS
Even if some day you come to forget me, I will always love and remember you.
My arms are always open to you, never hesitate to run to them.
I love you, and always will.
your keeper.